(Part 6) Like Father Like Son.

Jeff was home on his bed, looking at his ceiling. Surprisingly Jeff could only think of one thing, Sara…and not even that he missed her.
That stupid fucking bitch told EVERYONE at that damn hospital! What if I…have… prostate cancer…and they pull down my pants… They will defiantly be like ‘OH! This is the part where you fall off the roof right?’ … Call her? Ya, I’ll call her…but I’ll make her wait first…good Jeff…so this is what it feel’s to be wearing the pants huh? He heard his alarm clock go off… he looked at it… 6 o’clock… Only 4 more hours. Jeff couldn’t wait, he knew he was desperate…but desperate sex is better then no sex right?... No, Jeff knew that some how life was going to give him the finger and smack him across the face and send him to the relm of the virgins... where they watched Battle Star Galactica … and played World Of Warcraft, and Pokemon all day long day in and day out. Suddenly Jeff’s dad ran in.
“Do you have a girl in here?” asked Jeff’s dad, not having looked at Jeff’s bed yet.
“Umm… no… why?” Jeff now felt that he was sweating as he sat up in his bed, his dad looked at him and laughed.
“You screamed you pansy!” Jeff’s dad held the door frame and laughed some more.
“So why did you ask me if a girl was in here?” Jeff asked confused, by this point Jeff could see his father having problems standing up, due to laughing so hard.
“You sound like a chick!” He knelt down, still laughing, his face was beat red. Jeff knew he did… it was one of the main reason’s he wouldn’t go to a horror movie with anyone, yet still…
“No I don’t!” Jeff lied through his teeth, his dad had calmed himself down enough to stand up.
“Yes you do, you know it too… why do you have to lie all the time?” Jeff’s dad walked off.
I do lie a lot don’t I? Jeff was confused… he had never noticed this before… he didn’t used to be this way… but it seemed to have gotten worse… he laid back down on his side and looked around his room. What was he going to do? He just realized how extremely nervous he was about that night. His stomach was turning, his mind was going a mile a minute with stupid questions like. How do I start? I never even thought about foreplay! What if I can’t keep up? What if I don’t last long enough? What if I don’t even get the chance? What if she laughs at my…size…? What if Trojan decided to make a new condom and they were extremely complicated! That’s when Jeff jolted his eyes open again.
“Oh my god,” Jeff sat up and looked straight, being completely transparent.
“I don’t have any condoms!” He jumped up and looked at the clock, 9 o’clock.
“HOW HAS IT BEEN 3 HOURS!?” Jeff yelled as he ran around his room for cloths.
“AND WHY DO I NOT HAVE ANY CLOTHS!?” He ran downstairs, and looked at his dad, fully knowing that he had heard him.
“What? I decided to do your laundry as a nice gesture.”
“What have I been doing for the past 3 hours?” Jeff asked, hoping for an answer.
“You were sleeping… you seem to be doing that a lot lately… have you been prancing around the town kissing girls?” Jeff’s dad asked
“Dad… no…” once again his dad jumped in to put his little two cents into it.
“You know your not Katy Perry right?” His dad laughed, Jeff faked a smile at his dad’s little trivia pursuit joke.
“You know dad… when mom told you to pick up her role when she left you, I don’t think she meant to be watching Entertainment Tonight.” Jeff smiled to himself,
“Listen I’m just worried that you might have Mono…Monoluc…” his dad started
“Leosis, ya I know what it is dad, but I’ve started sleeping a lot since the fall.”
“Why do you need your cloths kid?” his dad asked changing topics.
“I…need to go… out.” Jeff didn’t want to lie again, he didn’t want to be a pathological liar.
“Well… you can wear my cloths?” Jeff bit his lip again trying not to laugh, his dad was 6.4 and a little bit on the heavy side, Jeff on the other hand was 5 11, and skinny… it wouldn’t work out.
“No… it’s ok dad.”
“Well there are some of your cloths you used to wear in the last drawer of your dresser.” His dad said.
“Offer taken back kid.” His dad smiled as he picked up a newspaper. Jeff smirked and ran upstairs. He walked into his room and opened the bottom drawer…
“No…” Jeff picked up the shirt and pants… the shirt had a huge picture of Pikachu and ask hugging each other with big words at the bottom saying ‘IT’S OK TO LOVE YOUR FRIEND THIS MUCH’ and the shorts…were like the little underwear you wore way back when you didn’t know the importance of the area it covered… So… there he was looking at his Pokegay shirt, and his shorts that Daisy Duke would have said that, that was too revealing.
“DAD?” he yelled downstairs hoping to hear his dad grow some sympathy.
“NICE AREN’T THEY? YOU’RE NOT WEARING MY CLOTHS.” His dad laughed to him. Jeff looked up.
“God…I hope you make tonight worth it.” Then Jeff stood up and put on the shorter then short shorts, the tidied pokemon shirt promoting intimate moments between human and creature… He stood up and walked out the door, then he hit the stairs…realizing there was no way he was able to make it down the stairs. He jumped down the stairs, legs tightly stuck together. He walked out the door to hear his father fall on the floor laughing, coughing and punching the floor. He sat in his car, and drove. He pulled up to traffic lights, and then he saw a car pull up besides him, it was Ted, He turned and just looked at Jeff, then he rolled down his window, Jeff rolled down his as well not looking impressed.
“Jeff… ummm.” Ted didn’t need to finish his sentence.
“Laundry day.” Jeff answered, not looking away from the front of his car.
“Ok… call me tonight…we… uhh… we gotta talk.” He said.
“Ya… I suppose we do don’t we.” Jeff said looking at his shirt.
“Ya… and Jeff,” Jeff looked at him to see a smirk across Ted’s face. “I love you too man, and if you weren’t with Amanda…” He couldn’t finish his joke, neither could Jeff, they both started laughing pretty hard.
“Ok… well I gotta go… green light and all… call me tonight.” And Ted drove off. So did Jeff, heading to the closest drug store. Jeff sped around the corner, and saw Mini Mart, he drove into the parking lot. He stepped out of his car to hear a whistle… he turned around.
“Aye bay, bay. Where you headed.” Jeff closed his eyes and swallowed.
“Hello, again officer…how are you today.”
“Oh I’m great now.” The cop said, head partially down, eyes looking past his glasses to see Jeff, walking towards him.
“Uhhh… I gotta go I’m on a tight schedule.” Jeff turned around and ran into the Mini Mart.
“YOU CAN RUN BUT WE’LL MEET AGAIN JEFFRY!”
I never told him my name…Ewwwww Jeff thought, he ran into Mini Mart and ran for the pharmacy. He turned the corner and saw the wall of condoms… he looked up and down the row… he turned his head to see the cashier, with his eyebrow raised giving a mix between a confused and disgusted look. Nervously Jeff grabbed a box and threw it on the cashier’s table, and threw 10 dollars with it. Not even wanting to look him in the face, he just looked at the ceilings. He heard the cashier laugh very hard before, finally he heard the cashier talk.
“Well…your…total is…” before he finished Jeff grabbed the box turned around and walked away. He made his way to his car where he finally saw what he had bought… he pleasure… a pink box with lavenders and other feminine things… he had walked in… looking the way he did…and bought her pleasure condoms…
“Well,” Jeff started, trying to calm himself down. “At least Amanda will be happy.”
He turned the keys and looked at the clock, it was 9:45, he still had time to get to Amanda’s house, she never said what time to come over. He drove towards her house. Then he walked towards her door and rang the doorbell. The door swung open, and Jeff’s jaw dropped. Around Amanda’s neck… was another girl.
“Who’s this Mandy?” Said the girl
“Oh, this is my boyfriend, hey Jeff.” Jeff couldn’t talk, he knew his girlfriend was slutty…but…
“I didn’t know you were… bi?” he asked, after a long awkward pause.
“Ya, me neither,” she leaned her mouth behind his ear. “I’m kinda drunk though… don’t tell her.” She giggled as she moved her head back, he could smell it…vodka and rum… yum… nothing more attractive then a drunk girl… correction… girls.
“Silly, I could hear you, I’m around your neck remember.” She giggled,
“Oh no, you are, well aren’t you sneaky.”
“Well… should I come back later?” Jeff asked… he was not giving up this easily, not after what he had been through.
“You’re too sneaky, I’ma have to punish you now.” Amanda said to the girl, the girl giggled and ran upstairs.
“Well… she seems nice.” Jeff said.
“Ya… I don’t know. You wanna join us Jeffy?” Amanda said, lightly biting her lip. Jeff thought for a second… he didn’t think he could handle seeing Amanda with anyone, he was incredibly jealous, but maybe this would be different.
“Ya, ok.” He said taking a step forward.
“Ya, I thought you would… too bad. Night.” Then she slammed the door on his face. He turned around and walked down her steps… this was the worst he had ever felt in his life. He couldn’t stand it anymore. He didn’t love Amanda, he didn’t like her, he had not intimate emotions towards her. He hated her. He drove for a little bit. Then he pulled to the side of the road… he was too emotional at the moment. He looked at his cell phone. He had 1 new message, he opened it franticly hoping it was from Amanda saying sorry it was all a joke, it wasn’t. It was his dad.
Have a lady at the house…can you not come back till tomorrow, thanks kiddo;)
“At least one of us is having a good night.” He looked at his arm… Sara’s phone number. He called.
“Hello?” It was her…good thing he couldn’t deal with her mom at the moment.
“Uhh hey Sara… I’m… having a bad night can I come over?”
“My mom’s not here… and you have a girlfriend…”
“I don’t care… but if you would get in trouble forget it.”
“No, I wouldn’t, my mom wouldn’t care…but won’t you’re girlfriend be pissed?”
“No…we aren’t together anymore.” Jeff wasn’t lying… he was done with her… had she talked to him a little longer he would have ended it.
“Oh, I’m so sorry…ya come over.” She gave him the directions and he went to her house.
“Hey. Long time no see… how’s the cop?” she joked, it worked Jeff gave a small smile.
“He’s good…saw me in this…” Jeff stepped in the light. Sara didn’t freak out or laugh.
“Hot.” She gave him a wink. Jeff couldn’t help himself, he moved in, grabbed Sara and starting kissing her, she kissed back. They moved into the house and up the stairs to Sara’s bedroom. Then they slammed the door shut… Jeff’s dad wasn’t the only one getting lucky that night.