(Part 3) Good Morning To You Too Soldier.

Jeff woke up the next morning, he was freezing, and sore everywhere. His side felt like it had been hit by a car. He raised his head, which was buried in woodchucks, to see a kid wind up and kick him in the side…the side that felt like it had been hit by a car.

“OUCH! You son of a bitch!” Jeff cringed as the kid moved back, holding his side.

“What do you think I am hun?” asked an older woman’s voice.

“Sorry, I didn’t actually mean it,” Jeff was about to go on apologizing, but he was trying to hold back tears from the kick, while still on the ground, before he could finish his apology she interrupted him.

“Well, you ain’t that bad lookin’ from the front. If you were a little older I would…” Jeff was shocked at what he was hearing, so he tried to stop her.

“Where am I?” he questioned hoping she would stop the topic she was on.

“Grossel park, well young man, imagine my surprise when I came down here with my 12 year old son and see your naked ass lying on the ground…” before she could finish Jeff looked down in terror…he WAS naked…at a children’s park.

“OH MY GOD!” he screamed, the woman kept talking as though he hadn’t said anything.

“Me, a helpless divorcé, needing a good time, finds a fine looking young man, naked. If only I knew you looked this good, I wouldn’t have called the cops.”
“The cops!” Jeff started to panic.

“Yes, I’m sorry hun, don’t worry, here,” the woman took a pen out of her purse and wrote an address on his arm. “You go here, and I’ll make sure I make it up to you..”

“Uhh… I’m sorry… I…have a girlfriend…it’s… an arranged wedding…she’s…my fiancé.” Jeff tried coming up with it on the spot…he knew it wasn’t good.

“Aww to bad hun, you are too cute, a fiancé huh? Well…let’s see if you still wanna be with her when I’m done with you.” She gave a wink, turned and walked away. Jeff tried to stop staring at her, completely confused, but he couldn’t.

“This is defiantly the weirdest morning ever.” He was about to walk over to his clothes he had spotted on top of the playgrounds roof when he heard a door slamming shut, he turned around. It was the same cop from last night, he walked over to Jeff, stopped in front of him and started.

“Well, well, well. What do we have here?” the cop raised his eyebrows and placed his hands on his hip. This is a really bad time to find out that this cop is gay. Although he knew he should be thinking of an excuse he couldn’t help but think that.

“Officer I can explain.” Jeff started but stopped, he needed all the time he could to think of an excuse.

“Mhmm, I’m sure you can, so kid, why aren’t you at the hospital.” The cop switched hips this time.

“Well, you see, when I got there my girlfriend was there and was crying, so I had to be strong for her, she loved my grandma as much as I did…”

“I thought it was HER grandmother.” SHIT! That’s what I told him last night. Jeff thought as quick as possible, then he thought of what to say.

“N…” Jeff didn’t even get a chance to finish his sentence.

“Are you telling me that your girlfriend and you have the same grandmother? Are you to related? That’s sick kid, that’s sick.” The cop had changed his position so that it looked like he was bleeding authority.

“No sir, we are not related…that is sick… last night I know I was telling you that she was hers. But I was very emotional, I didn’t know what I was saying.” The cop calmed down.

“Oh I see, makes sense. Well why are you here naked then?”

“Well her mom wouldn’t let me stay over…and my car ran out of gas on the way to her house, so I fell asleep here.”

“And your naked because?” Jeff thought as quickly as possible.

“I have no idea sir.”

“Well then, go get them and we’ll pretend this never happened. And by the way…” The cop looked down to Jeff’s waist. “Good morning to you too, soldier.” The cop then looked up, back to Jeff’s face. Jeff looked down, covered his soldier and turned around to headed for the playground. He realized, the roof was way to high up, he had to get on the railing, then he heard to noises, one was a whistle, he turned to the cop quickly enough to see him lowering his hand and putting it behind his back, and he heard a coyote howl he turned to the direction of the howl, he saw the old lady hide behind a tree.

God damn this is stupid…and…very, very, awkward. Thought Jeff. He lifted his left leg on to the roof and pulled himself up. Then he walked up and picked up his cloths, when he was still up he heard another car, with his cloths in his arms, he heard a scream.
“JEFF?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!” he turned around as quickly as possible, and saw it was Amanda, stepping out of her car, unfortunately he also lost his balance, and fell down, he rolled off the roof screaming and hit his head off of the monkey bars, and landed back on the ground. Jeff tried lifting his head but it just fell back down. Jeff was unconscious.